A Monica Geller Confession

It was FINALLY the day! The day I'd been waiting for for three months. A day every newly married woman looks forward to. 

Yes, you've probably guessed what I'm referring to; the day I got to use my new kitchen rug of course! I had registered for this rug months and months ago, and I was finally going to use it!

Marc and I had moved from our little double wide in town to the farmhouse out in the country, and I was finally unboxing and using all our new pretty gifts! And one of those gifts was a cushy, beige, fabric rug for my tootsies to stay comfy while I washed dishes. 

Being so excited about my new rug was mistake number 1, but before I get into that, let me explain a little bit about myself. 

I'm a neat freak. Think Monica Geller from FRIENDS or think Danny Tanner from Full House (I've run out of 90's sitcoms to pull characters from so... I just like things clean, okay?) I can't point to a specific day when I caught this OCCD (Obsessive Compulsive Cleaning Disorder), but I've definitely come to realize that I have OCCD, especially moving out to the country (and being married to a man. Even a neat one.)

I get so much joy out of seeing a clean sink, free of dishes. It gives me an absolute thrill to vacuum little carpet lines into the rugs. I'm almost giddy when the sun streams into a freshly cleaned window. And walking across a tile floor barefoot without stepping on crumbs makes me do a happy dance!

Wow, okay I''ll stop. Just know I could keep going... So now that we're clear on the fact that I'm a crazy cleaning lady, let's talk about my rug some more.

A solid day after I'd set the new rug out beside the sink I came home after work to find something brownish on it. I dashed across the kitchen and inspected the brownish marks. It wasn't from brownie crumbs, or just dirt. My keen city-girl-cleaning eye had never seen such a substance in the house before. Nothing would take the stain out. I was puzzled for about 10 minutes. Then it finally clicked. We live in the country, around the farm, and cattle, and... manure.

It was manure. 

I had manure on the new, beautiful, beige kitchen rug! And seeing how there are only two people living in our house, and one of them was me, who I knew did not step in any manure recently... I deducted who the poop-spreading culprit was: Marc.

I was annoyed, but thankfully before he got home I realized that it was just a rug... regardless of how pretty and clean it was. This was the beginning of the end of my OCCD. Ever since, I've been seeing how it's impossible to keep everything spotless, especially living on the farm. (Seriously, I dust, and three hours later, it's like I haven't dusted in weeks.)

One poopy rug at a time, I'll slowly but surely get over my OCCD.